Un-Super Mom

My kids just can't catch a break. It's been a few days in a row now that I have had some pretty major yelling spells directed at the girls. Emma prayed the other night that God would give me "patience with [the kids]" but even Ty was frustrating me the other day when he wouldn't eat the new food (avocado) and thus wouldn't eat anything after that...and he's only 9 months old. These tough days have been extra discouraging to me because I assumed that when I came out of my own time of personal trials everything else in my life would fall into place and be perfect; I assumed that my patience would be back. And sometimes I can pinpoint certain things that make me more irritable, such as hunger and running late, but particularly frustrating to me is when the kids are whining before they even have breakfast. The girls will fight, still in their beds in the morning, about not wanting to be the pretend character that the other is assigning them.

The other day Emma threw a royal fit because she now only wants to wear leggings, and they have to be "tight, with no bumps." This narrows her pants down to about 3 pairs. That morning I even pulled out the there-are-kids-in-the-world-who-have-no-clothes line. This just got a blank stare. The whining did not stop even after all the reasoning I was trying with her, and I finally exploded. I was at the end of my rope. Emma was sent to her bed, with nothing on it, for an indefinite amount of time. After I cooled down I was able to talk to her again, apologize for freaking out, and she really seemed to accept my explanation that I will not do the laundry every day so that she can wear the pants that she prefers. We hugged, and she accepted the "baggy" pants that she had to wear that day...for part of the day, at least.

I know that the best way to be with my kids is calm. I want them to be calm, so I totally know that freaking out is displaying horrible behavior, but part of me wonders if Emma would have really listened to me and understood what I was saying without the blow up. I had been speaking calmly to her all morning about the pants debacle, but got nowhere.

So, this is a lot of rambling, but I just thought I'd put this out there cause I often use this blog to post the times that I've been a super mom. And I have a lot of those moments, and I'm proud of them, but I am, just as often, the frazzled, frustrated, freaking out mom!